Why it hurts so much

There is a fleeting moment when one first wakes up in the morning. You might not remember that task or assignment that has been making you stressed, you might not be completely aware of having to go to work or school in the next hour. It is a state of pure blank bliss before your brain begins reminding you of all the things that require attention.

Article by Lachlan Peters @loque91

This morning I endured a particularly bad awakening. It seemed for a moment that perhaps the night before had all just been a twisted nightmare… but then my brain got to work reminding me of what is real. It was very depressing. Last night happened, it is history. It is fact.

Tottenham’s complete capitulation at the hands of already relegated Newcastle was a completely disheartening experience to watch. It hurt. This article is my exploration of why it felt like such a profound kick in the guts.

Same old Spursy Spurs

There was a moment - early in the game - when Eriksen was basically walking with the ball, nothing really happening around him - he was cleanly dispossessed from behind and offered little resistance. Newcastle would score soon after. It really encapsulated a lot for me, not only for that match but for the whole run in toward the season’s end.

Tottenham seemed to completely rest on their laurels, second seemed a given. Dembele and Alli had just started their holiday a little earlier than the rest of the gang – no biggy. We can just cruise on in. Nope, out flanked and out manoeuvred with little retaliation – with a massive consequence. A crucial first goal in that game, and a crucial place dropped in the big scheme of things.

*sigh*

It is a fairly obvious point to make that we simply expected more. We all did. I’m sure I don’t just speak for myself when I say at one point we were half expecting the title to be ours. And it was this expectation, this hope, which makes yesterday’s result just so hard to bear. What’s that old saying? “It’s the hope that kills you”.

Which actually brings up a pretty interesting dilemma. The only way we can all feel so let down right now, is to have been able to enjoy the ridiculous highs that we have this season. We were given some real gems, some serious and attractive football to be really proud of. We had last minute winners, derby demolitions, broke unbeaten records and looked like we had all but banished the embarrassing results that had often plagued our wonderful club. We were making “spursy” an antiquated notion.

I remember having this realization, perhaps after we beat City at WHL, being aware that I had stopped simply ‘hoping’ for great results – but had begun expecting them. Expecting comebacks, expecting a sturdy defence and expecting classy goals.

Toon Nightmare

The manner of the defeat did not help. Obviously. The lads chose a pretty inopportune time to give up that nice ‘not losing by more than one goal’, thing we had going. A completely insipid display from Son and Mason got them an early shower, Kyle Walker couldn’t cross one half decent ball into the box, Kane barely got a touch of the ball unless he ran back to half way to get it, Toby and Jan looked completely out of sorts. Most looked tired and unwilling to make anything happen.

It didn’t help that we also had to suffer the injustice of a penalty awarded for a blatant dive – who dives when your club is already relegated?! Naturally coming at the most precise time to cause the maximum amount of anguish – right at the time some of us had started dreaming of a comeback. The tale was there, one last hoorah for us to cheer about – except nope. It’s almost like you’d forgotten which team you support.

The bitter taste

The EPL is a nine month long emotional rollercoaster. The Newcastle incident hurts so much because of what we had already been through. Early season draws left us as fans in a position not too distant to what we were used too emotionally. A top four place would be a dream come true, but we shouldn’t get our hopes up lest we see them dashed, as we have all so frequently experienced. But we grew with this team, we watched as they bonded on the pitch and we echoed their passion. Then we began to dream - and with good reason! We were in with a real shot. But we came back down to reality after Chelsea, still content with second of course. But no, that was given up too.

This team is brilliant, and we have everything to be proud of and excited about. We have players that care about the club and want to impress the supporters. We have a new stadium, a return to the Champions League, and a great manager.

The future is not now though. I’m sad to say it but this result, and the last few in fact, have in my opinion seriously tarnished an otherwise amazing season. I know we can’t judge a season by one game, but the whole run in has been a rather mediocre showing. It made me feel like we didn’t deserve second. How else could you as a fan react to those five goals? It hurts because we have this bad taste in our mouths, this terrible moment to tide us over until next season. It’s hard to focus on the positives when the most glaring negative is in such recent memory.

I believe that you get out what you put in with football. The more you care, the more you can be rewarded – and when its good it can be a truly great feeling, but when its bad…Ergh. No pain no gain right?

You can find me on Twitter @loque91 and for all your Spurs needs follow e-Spurs on Twitter, Facebook and all other internet platforms! The e-Spurs Podcast is also out twice weekly, so get on board!

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