Excuse the hyperbole but the difference between Guantanamo Bay inmates and Tottenham fans are that we mostly wear white rather than the bright orange of the former. The metaphor doesn't stop there. Watching the games lately have been akin to a very dull version of waterboarding. Lamela dribbles, drip-drip-drip, Fazio clears poorly, drip-drip-drip, Lloris saves us, drip, Eriksen gets a late winner, drippy-drip drip.
The team has managed to gel and un-gel on a game by game basis, sometimes within the same game. We are more of a mousse than a gel, or if we have to be a gel we are that bright green pound shop gel you used when you didn't have disposable income. To say we are inconsistent is an understatement. There are less up and downs in a Bavarian knocking shop (according to the Per Mertesacker Institute of Sexual Statistics).
Against Swansea we looked good for about ten minutes of play. This does not take away from the great individual performances of Lloris, Davies, Kane and Eriksen. But as a cohesive unit we appear to only manage a good team ethos in both attack and defence for ten minutes. If we look back to the Chelsea game we looked like a gelled attacking unit for 10 minutes. Yesterday against Swansea we looked like we might carve them apart, until we managed to blunt our knives and retreat further and further into our own half. Theres a possibility that this is down to confidence. Our results do not follow an improved pattern, we have only managed two wins on the bounce twice this season and like a Tarantino film we seem to start at Chapter 9 and then flip back to Chapter 2. Without consistent performances we will continue to have this stop-start season. Luckily for us we have Burnley and Leicester next. Both of these teams have poor form over the last five games and both are teams that we shouldn't be worried about. Despite that I will be watching with nail biting ritualistic frustration.
On the European front we have finally been beaten in a group match following three years without a loss. We seem to prefer playing in Europe, our team works best when balls are not being played over the top. Having finished second we will now face Fiorentina in the last 32. Having had a shaky start to their season they have now gone on a run of 4 games unbeaten, with three wins in that run. They sit 8th in Serie A after a 4-1 away win against Cesena. They, like us, are also better away than at home. With talented players in their squad you could say they are underachieving and if you did say that you'd be right. Juan Cuadrado is one such player, he's scored four goals this season and is their second scorer after the amusingly named Babacar; which sounds like a really tiny car for babies. Their team among others has Micah Richards, Aquilani, Marko Marin and Mario Gomes. But between now and February anything could happen with sales, loans and injuries.
The futures bright...The futures hopefully not orange jumpsuits.
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not the best choice of analogy
ReplyDeleteWhat would you choose? I knew I should have used an analogy about hats
ReplyDeleteInconsistent, under-acheivers with no fluidity or control in any match recently bar 10-minute spells. Totally agree. As for the analogy, drip drip drip is right. And I think Guantanamo Bay torturers are the perfect analogy. Because we're tortured every single match. Watching Chelsea is like a full body massage whilst lying on a chocolate-covered naked model in the Bahamas in comparison!
ReplyDeleteTo be in a basement flat. Hat catching the drips at the foot of the bed from the leaky ceiling. Drip. Drip. Drip. The all hours Bavarian knocking shop above. It's a place befitting a tight budget and low expectations. Some call it home.
ReplyDelete